Tip toe through the Tulips....

I feel so blessed to live here where 

I get to enjoy Spring at it's finest. 

The Tulips are blooming. Each day new

buds are blossoming.

Saturday afternoon, the sun peeked out and I was

able to do some weeding.

 Once I started, I kept going

till it was too dark

too see. But it felt so good to

work out in the yard.

It's the easiest time to weed, because the soil is

moist and the weeds come out without much trouble. This is the

before and...

This is the after.  They are so vibrant. 

I just can't get over how beautiful they are. 

Have you tippy toed lately?

"georgie"

Vlog brain art

So I am putting myself out there.
Love me or leave me, This is me.
 I am coming out of the fog.
I couldn't write it all down so I did this video diary 
this morning after I saw my Doctor. 


reality vlog

This evening I am actually feeling myself again. 

It took 4 days of getting it out of my system

and I am free again. 

I feel alive!

Thank you my friends who reached out to me.

I know it was only a couple of weeks but I was getting pretty

desperate. I have so much empathy for those who are chronic sufferers.

I don't know what I would have done if it went longer. I hope

I don't have to go through this again. I learned one thing, and that is, to listen to

your body. It will tell you what it needs. I hope I am always

in tune to it. 

sincerely

"georgie"

 

I'm in a Funk..

I'm in a Funk, and I can't seem to get out of it. 

 I woke up Monday morning, just really blue. If you know me by now, you know

I am not a depressed bluey sad person.  But for some reason I woke up this way, I don't know if it my 

body or my brain or my mind, but I can't seem to get out of it. Believe me

I don't want to be. I can't seem to jog my way, or pray my way or listen to

the scriptures my way or even serve my way out of it. 

Tuesday I called a lady in my ward (from our church congregation) to go out to

lunch on Thursday. I thought it would be a nice gesture, to get to know her better. She is

still fairly new and doesn't have a lot of friends. So yesterday, I got up

took care of some chores and still I was just down. I even had to talk to myself, 

telling myself, you're doing something for someone- snap out of it will ya! 

We had a nice afternoon I took her to the Deseret Book Store, she loved it. I picked up some

books that I'm going to be giving to some new sisters at church, we had a nice lunch.

But even after all that, when I got home, the blue's just came back. 

As I am typing this, I feel it so heavily.  What to do, what to do?

So I told my youngest daughter this last night, and she asked me is it because she

has moved out of the house and my husband and I are now emptynesters? 

I told her, I am denying that, because I can't believe that  something like that

would manifest itself  physically. I don't know, do you think subconsciously that could be? 

I mean, come 'on she just moved 5 minutes away. Personally I think

there's something physical happening. Because in my mind, I am not one 

that suffers from depression. But can my physical body?  I know such a heavy subject 

for today.  Less than 2 weeks ago I  met with my Doctor and he was asking me how I was doing and I told him fine, I'm happy everything is going well. Then  Bam!! less than  

three days later I wake up like this.  It's like the saying: I've fallen and I can't get up. 

I know, are you thinking, "You just need a good cry"! Yeah I thought of that too. 

But nothing has brought be to tears yet.  I don't have the time at this moment. 

The thing is, It's going to happen, soon or later, the "breaking point" is going to happen

when I least expect it and  then crash....  

I think it's time to face the fact that I have to go back to my Doctor - it's gotta be

some half way century mark of imbalanced hormones or something.

My co-worker said maybe I should see a therapist. I asked her for what? 

I don't have any issues. All they are going to do is ask me about my childhood 

and seriously I don't have any baggage that I'm holding on to. Really

if you know me, and I think you do,  I don't hold on to grudges. 

My year book states that I  was known as "The Most Perky Girl". I am

positive, I am happy, I am the cockeyed Optimist. 

I am Fun.  Yes get real, I am known for Fun...
** So it is a week later, and I am still feeling this way, as soon as I get a minute
I'm going to call my Doctor, I promise. But I am feeling physically weird.

"georgie"